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If you are a CFS/ME patient, family member or a loved one, you know first hand that adopting the new name ME/CFS is of utmost importance. Why? There is great significance in names. They can change the way people perceive an illness or chronic disorder and the person who has it.

I work for an organization that also went through a name change. It was not done over night. These things rarely are. We went from the American Association on Mental Retardation to the American Association on Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities. This did not change the condition, but we hope it will change some attitudes. Chants of “you’re a retard” have brought a world of hurt to people who have cognitive disabilities. By finding a more precise name, we hope to change attitudes, just as we hope ME/CFS will do the same.

In the midst of all the very serious work we do and as we live with disabling conditions, there needs to be a time to smile. I want to share with you this essay and I hope it will bring you a smile.

As editor of a scientific journal, I often come across names that make me think of the middle-school years of those with unusual names. The following are either physicians or PhD's:

I suppose that if you have a certain name combined with the appropriate inclination, your calling may be set at the beginning of your life, though I’am a Taylor and I can’t sew. My husband walks around with at least one button missing from each of his shirts.

Pet’s names can be great fun. “Ethel” is the worst I have recently heard, though Itsy Poo is a close second. I have a parakeet named Spike and a dog named Barbie June, a result of allowing my children to choose names. Barbie June the Bichon is a barker, especially when I’am on a business call. She just knows. One day I was calling my publication director at home. While the phone was ringing, the barking was getting progressively louder. I said, with great anger in my voice, just as the phone was answered, “Barbie June! I am going to hang you from the ceiling fan!” When I said hello, the response was “Excuse me?” I learned, much to my embarrassment, that my boss’s wife’s name is . . . Barbie June. He had always referred to her as BJ.

My children, when teenagers, loved the story about a man I encountered during a summer job. This is the unvarnished truth. Can you even begin to imagine the middle-school years of Harry Balls?

Everyone in Texas knows about a past governor, Mr. Hogg, who named his daughters Ima and Ura. Myth or truth? I don’t know, though through the wonders of the Internet, I am now going to find out.

She [Ima Hogg] became ill in late 1918 and spent the next two years in Philadelphia under the care of a specialist in mental and nervous disorders.She did not return to Houston to live until 1923.

I wonder whether any of her problems were caused by teasing in middle- school and beyond, way beyond.

I sent this essay to a high school friend, Janet, whose last name was Frass when we were in school. I laughed out loud at her response:

“When I was at the University of Texas, I worked for the Hogg Foundation for Mental Health! “ Talking about coincidence!

My maiden last name had a big ass in the middle of it. I didn't improve things much with marriage: Fronk. At least I didn't chose to hyphenate it into Frass-Fronk. When I got divorced, there was no going back to Frass. Fronk was actually better. One day a pest guy was talking to me about my house and the findings of the inspection. He started to explain about frass. “What?” I asked. "You know . . . droppings." Apparently my immigrant great grandparents unwittingly took their beautiful last name, W'rasse, and turned it into roach droppings. Top that one!

When I was a teenager, my mother was acting very distraught for several days. (This wonderful woman barely escaped the Holocaust. Obviously, English was not her first language, although in addition to plain old English, she amazingly learned the rules of grammar and became a voracious reader. If she read an “R-rated” book, she would tear the page out after she read it, so it wouldn't get in the hands of her teenager. She amassed quite a pile with Peyton Place, a very racy novel at the time.) But I digress: back to the story. I finally confronted my mother and asked why she seemed so upset with me. She said, “Why does everyone call you corva?” I replied, “Mom, they call me Corvette, the name of a car that sounds like Yvette. What does corva mean?” She sighed with relief and told me that it means “whore” in Yiddish.

Turning to my short stint as an English teacher, I recall students having great fun with my maiden name, which is Stitsky.

Remove the firstS
Change the firsttto anland thei to a u
Change the firsttto anh(I don’t think anyone did that. I was 21 and relatively “cute” by teacher standards.)
Remove the initialSand theky.

I think you get my point. There is a slight possibility that this was the reason a nice Jewish girl married two Protestants, They both came with very nice last names that I never had to spell for people, and no longer would I have to go through life as Yvette Stitsky, a name that evoked visions of a recent immigrant with a kerchief on her head.

My sons and I found, however, that nefarious middle-school students today are so devious that they can find a way to turn any name into a taunt, even the benign Taylor. I don’t think anyone is really safe.

When I first arrived at the University of Texas, I met a guy and told him my first name, but I refused to tell him my last name or give him my phone number. Towards the end of my freshman year, he called. By that time I had learned he was quite the catch. He told me that he went through the student directory every day looking for me and it took him months. He had no interest in dating me anymore, just an obsession to find me.

Last true story; I have a relative who changed his name from Stitsky to Stitskin. Why? The reasons to this date are still unknown.

Now kidding aside, the name change for CFS is way overdue and I hope you will actively participate in these important efforts. Be part of it! Send an e-mail to: info@afairname.org. And tell them that you want to help in any way you can.

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